Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Broken - or better?

It has been 361 days since my engagement ended (I had to look at a calendar to figure that out!).  So much has changed, I feel like a totally different person since then.  However, there have been some moments in the past few weeks that have made me stop and think.
  • A co-worker at the slopes turned to me and asked "So, how's married life?"  The two people in between us had a look of horror and shock on their face - I kind of wish I had a camera to capture it.  I simply responded "I didn't get married."  That's all I needed to say, right??!?  SHE DIDN'T BELIEVE ME!  She thought I was kidding when I said that!  It took one of the other ladies saying "X, she REALLY didn't get married" for her to believe me.  It struck me, not because of the question, but because of the disbelief.  With the tone I had used, I really don't know how she thought I was kidding!
  • Today, a friend sent me a text.  She started it by saying that if it drug up bad memories or I didn't want to talk about it, she understood and I could ignore her.  I was a little worried, until I read the rest.  She's worried about how to keep her wedding budget down.  I guess I can understand why she would think it would bother me.... except I've already offered her help.  It's been 361 days - and I'm EXTREMELY happy that it ended.  I told her she might as well use the knowledge, I wasted enough time accumulating it!
 There are things that have happened in the past year that were extremely negative that dealt with this topic.  As a whole though, I look back... and all I am is thankful.  Thankful I am not looking at an impending divorce.  Thankful that I've been able to reconnect with some people.  Thankful that I could buy a house and decorated it how I wanted needed it.  I might have had some hard times, and I might not agree with all decisions, but I am so so SO thankful that I am not a Mrs. yet.  It will happen, and when it does, I will know.  And as my friend said, I can put all my researching to good use (or just have someone else plan it all for me!).


Bicoastal Bride said...

Well said! I think you have a great perspective, so keep it up.

faithtrustnpixiedust said...

Glad that you are thankful. After I called off my wedding some people did the same to me for awhile after, but you are definitely not broken! You are much better. You are a happier more amazing you!

Together We Save said...

I am so glad you are happy!!

Miss Pancakes said...

I'm a new follower! Life is filled with surprises. Keep your head up dear! Looking forward to your new experiences!